Well, that’s embarrassing

Today: my plan was to do 10 miles on the indoor bike (just under 4o minutes) then walk outside for 3 miles. Well, the outside walk was 2 very slow miles as the bike..well…changing by mile: 1, 2, 3, 4,3,3,3,1,1,5 and the final 3 minutes killed me. It was not quite as hard as racing 5k.

So, the outdoor 2 miler (on mostly plowed paths) was really just a cool down.

Another catch up

prepping, reading, dental work…and snow.

Wed: weights plus a slow 2 mile outdoor walk.

Weights: 50 reps outside (10 sets of 5; it was just hard today)
bench: 10 x 134, 10 x 145
incline: 5 x 134, 5 x 134, 4 x 134
trap bar dead: 4 inch: 10 x 134, 10 x 184, 10 x 234
6 inch: 10 x 280

Thursday: slow, snowy 4.1 mile walk around campus (after dental work)

Friday: walk to and from Walgreens (very slow, snowy in places)
pull ups: 5, 5, 3 reasonable sets of 10, mixed grip: 5, 5 (much easier than Wednesday)
bench: 10 x 134, 5 x 155, 5 x 155, 5 x 155
inline: 4 x 134, 5 x 134 (ran out of gas)
high incline: 7 x 94, 7 x 94, 10 x 94

Note: knee ache the night of the 7’th and some knee ache on the next two nights; 5 miles may have been too much..or is is weather?

Enjoying the college football play off games.

Wednesday: saw Bradley lose to Drake 64-57 in a very physical game.

No game but

I had tickets for the Jaguars at Colts, but decided not to go due to the treacherous highway conditions between here and there (normally a 3:30 trip)

So I watched the woman’s basketball team instead and got in a slowish, flat 4 mile walk. It was just over 15 minutes per mile. I was kind of tired from yesterday, yadda yadda.

The women won their game (vs a 2 win Indiana State team) which is a big improvement from last year.

Why are old people grumpy?

No, I did no “research” to see if older people are grumpier than younger people. But this Threads post generated some discussion:

https://www.threads.net/@walterbr42/post/DEYm4AUsFCJ

Here is the screen shot:

“Legit question: why do people get angrier as they get older? Especially people who are financially secure and generally doing okay in life.”

Now, as previously stated, one could challenge the hypothesis of this question. But if one accepts it, or merely wants to answer the question “what are older people unhappy about or angry about” , one has to be careful: not everyone has the same life experience.

That being said, I’ll answer for myself, with the caveat that my answer reflects MY personality, life experiences, etc.

  1. Physical deterioration My physical abilities have declined. I’ve talked about this at length in other places. I’ll just say that, at one time in my life, I could expect to finish a 5k in under 20 minutes. Now it takes me 33-35 minutes (as a power walker; my “run” would not be much faster.) It took me 3:05 to finish a half marathon as a walker. 25 years ago, I walked it in 2:17 and 26 years ago, I ran it in 1:34. I’ve suffered similar declines in strength; my current max trap bar deadlift (300-314) is roughly what my lifetime bench press used to be (310). Pull ups: 20 has no become 10. It goes on. Closely aligned with that is:
  2. Pain and chronic conditions Knees (severe patellofemoral osteoarthritis), lumbar (spondylolisthesis leading to foraminal stenosis), shoulder (os acromiale, which leads to rotator cuff issues). I do 20-30 minutes of PT every day in addition to working out. And working out: yeah, it hurts…a little. But my choices is to move and hurt a little, or do nothing and hurt a lot. The stenosis causes tingling feet but most of the time is not too bad, but I have to stretch a lot.
  3. Death and deterioration of friends and loved ones. Few people my age have living parents. But as one advances toward the expected value of lifespan, the number of friends and loved ones who die or become incapacitated, either physically or mentally, increases. And as a side note: when you want to plan an activity, (say, select sports tickets), one has to take into account what one’s friends can do (can they get to those seats?)

And let’s face it: there comes a time when one’s spouse starts to fail, at least physically. That is both inconvenient and emotionally painful.

4. Change. Now some have claimed that “change is scary” but that really isn’t the case for me. I’d say that change can be very annoying and irritating. Here are some examples: new software packages and new high level computer languages are always being introduced. Just as one gets proficient and comfortable, someone makes a change, and that leads to even more unproductive effort. Eventually, one gets tired of it.

Another example (first world problems): I used to take my wife’s “special needs adult” nephew to NFL games. He has a condition where he should eat lunch at the game. Pre covid: easy, hand him money. But now things are “cashless”: so, there is the added hassle of getting him a prepaid credit card. It is just one more thing. Yes, I see the benefit of being cashless.

Then there are the enthusiastic younger people who are just so sure that “we were doing it all wrong” and that THEY have all the answers. And once in a while, they are right. But most of the time, their “new” ideas are hare-brained; and in fact, their “new” ideas are merely “new to them”: we’ve tried them before and understand why they won’t work. But oh now, we are merely inflexible idiots.

And, there are some cases where the nature of our jobs have changed, as has our employer. In my case: I would NOT have accepted a job offer from my current employer in its current state; it was a great offer and had much of what I wanted at the time of the offer (1991). I won’t leave (unless I get sacked) because I am too close to retirement and I would not be attractive to other employers. Closely related is:

5. Mental deterioration Yes, I am very glad that I am not starting my math Ph. D. right now. I am still competent enough to teach undergraduate mathematics, and I’ve gained some perspective with my years. But learning new things (at advanced levels) off the beaten path is tough. Yes, I picked up a book on life contingencies and learned it well enough to teach a course (as a stand in) but that was hard work! And at times, I tend to shy away from the hard work of learning that is both difficult and brand new to me if there is no pay-off. My mental plasticity has decreased. No, at the moment, my mental deterioration is nowhere near as great as my physical deterioration, and I had more going for me mentally than I did physically to begin with. I have “more steps to lose” here.

6. Unrequited love and unfulfilled dreams and goals. I remember thinking that, when I got my Ph. D., I was going to work super hard and make that big discovery to get me to a research job. Then reality hit: I wasn’t that good, and it took most of my abilities and energies to do the job that I was actually hired to do. So…be happy I got somethings published and enjoyed myself (at times) along the way. And then, just over a year ago, the job really changed. I’ll keep the rest of what I am thinking to myself. Let’s just say that my angst is a mixture of inflated expectations and a tough break.

CAVEAT I don’t want to imply that my life is a living hell; in fact, I rather enjoy it (most of the time). There is still a lot I look forward to. I still enjoy loved ones and friends, and I honestly enjoy being able (at the moment) to help out others who have had it harder in life.

And, let’s just say that when the house, car, and child’s college education is paid off, there is more money for better sports tickets, trips and the like. Of course, there is a yin-yang here: I can afford to buy more weight plates for my home gym, but I am not strong enough to lift all that I have right now, and that isn’t going to ever improve.

I suppose it might be a better exercise to list things that I have to be grateful for (and I do this privately) but some things are probably best kept private.

But I just wanted to answer this young man’s question.

stretching it a bit

The long and short of it: a bunch of small irritations (plus sloth) lead to me getting a late start. So it was “walking only.” It wasn’t that bad: I did the 4 mile “out and back” and added a flat 1.25 mile campus loop and the mileage worked out in the end.

I wore knee braces (17 F at the start) and footing was good. This is better than the recent snail-slow slogs. But I’ll find out tonight if I exceeded my limits.

Settling in

Well, I am getting a bit back into the routine today.

Workout notes: slow 2 mile walk across campus with no knee wraps.
Weights: pull ups: 10, 5, 5, 10, 10, 5, 5. I am not saying each 10 rep set was outstanding quality.

Bench: 10 x 134, 4 x 160, 4 x 155, 4 x 155, 4 x 155
high incline: 3 sets of 10 x 84
trap bar dead; 4 inch 10 x 134, 10 x 184, 10 x 234

6 inch: 10 x 280 (got me out of breath).

What football has done to me and for me

There are several places on social media that advise future college football players; this is one of them. Much of their advice is of the following variety: “not everyone can be a Big Ten/SEC player, or even D1” and “remember this is a cold blooded business.” It is interesting.

But I’ll talk about things from my perspective: I was someone who didn’t have snowball’s chance in hell of playing at ANY level; not even D3, NAIA, etc.

From the time I was in grade school to high school, I lived and breathed football. By the time I got to junior high: I was lifting weights, running wind sprints, etc. In high school: weights (extra), stadium steps, ALL of the recommended summer workouts plus..every frigging day.

I trained HARD. What it got me: 2 years starting on JV, 1 year starting on varsity (small school), 1 year of playing just enough to letter on the varsity (larger school in Texas).

The cold blooded numbers: all that running got me to a….5.8 40 (not a misprint..just under 6 seconds). Ok, it got me to a 5:54 mile..not bad for a lineman but that wasn’t helpful for football. I didn’t hit 300 lb in the bench until I was 26.

Simply put: the genetics were not there.

I didn’t exactly shine at the other sports either, though I did win a few wrestling matches vs small school competition

So…first year in college, I was in the stands. And frankly, it hurt. The game had progressed without me and I felt discarded. That I did not measure up hurt. I remember seeing a photo of a famous freshman playing (Hugh Greene of Pitt) playing and I was insanely envious.

To this day, at times, I *still* feel like a major failure. Yes, I KNOW what an “outlier” is and I know that it is unreasonable to feel robbed because I wasn’t the outlier that I lusted after being. But emotions are illogical things.

Just because you want something and put in the work does not mean you will get it.

So, would I have been better off had I never cared about football or sports?

Side note about college: I was accepted by Annapolis, West Point, University of Texas, Rice University and Yale, and had financial aid to the latter 3 schools. I went to Annapolis and graduated on time, served in the Navy, and went on to get a Ph. D. in mathematics at the University of Texas. Oh, and none of the schools were interested in my football abilities. 🙂

So, what did this have to do with football and sports?

Ok, let’s talk about the Ph. D. I took that on 4 years after my math degree, and I started my program with an astonishing amount of ignorance. Let’s put it this way: in my graduate algebra class, I did not remember what a “normal subgroup” was. I am not making this up.

Needless to say, my first year of graduate school was very rough. I failed a few exams, felt like a complete idiot in class and, frankly, was intimidated by the smarter, better prepared students. To say that my first semester grades were lackluster would be an understatement. I sure looked as if I were to be one of the 70 percent that washed out.

But here is where football (and other sports) came in: I remembered what it was like to be intimidated…to be assigned to block someone who was too quick for me. I had missed tackles, missed blocks, gotten screamed at by coaches. But I did NOT quit then, and I didn’t quit in graduate school either.

The difference is that, in graduate school, I had the intellectual ability to rise to the challenge. I had to overcome my lack of preparation: I did that by studying insanely hard. I had to overcome being intimidated: this time I was in an arena that I was better suited for.

In sports, I had gotten off the deck numerous times. In my first wresting match, I got pinned in 19 seconds and those on the other team were openly laughing at me! But I learned to either tune out the naysayers or even use it as motivation to keep at it.

And so, I really believe that the resilience that I learned on the football field (and in other sports) served me well, especially in an endeavor where I had at least a little bit of natural ability.

And there was a secondary benefit: in preparing for football, I grew to love working out and pushing myself. I still do that to this day. And the I see the inevitable injuries or “chronic condition flare ups” as normal obstacles to overcome. So, I think that I am healthier because of it. And I still enjoy low key competitions such as neighborhood 5k races (though I now power-walk these).

So, while I regret that I had somewhat of a bad attitude when I played (too selfish) and I wish I had accepted the verdict that I simply didn’t “have what it took” to be a featured football player at a large high school (never mind the higher levels), I do not regret trying and giving it my all. It was a part of my overall “education in life” that I feel served me well later on down the road.

January 2 catch up

December 30: got on the road in Austin. Before leaving:

weights: hotel gym. 3 sets of dumbbell exercises: high incline (40s), curls (20s), bench (50s) 3 sets of 10. Then machines: 3 sets of 10: curls, rows, pull downs, flies. Then a slowish walk (2.2 miles on mostly crushed gravel 34:55).

Drove north; along the way I stopped at a rest area and got 30 dreadful reps on a pull up bar (sets of 5, one 4+1).

Later: I got to Newport, Arkansas, and stayed at a Days Inn. I took a 2.1 mile stroll (in 40 degree temperatures; it was in the 70s in Texas) and finished with McDonald’s pancakes. It is really a decent breakfast.

Drove north to Illinois; I was able to listen to the first 3 quarters of the Illinois Citrus Bowl victory and watched the final quarter at home. Got to hand it to the Illini: they did not blink. They FINISHED the game; 5 of their 10 wins were decided in the closing moments of the 4’th quarter or in overtime.

Jan 1 in Illinois: Got to watch Texas hold off a spirited Arizona State team and Ohio State’s 41-21 destruction of a good Oregon team. I was expecting BOTH games to be close.

But I got my workout in first: 2 miles of walking over halftime of the first game, and a morning weight workout:

pull ups: 10 (kind of sloppy), 5, 5, 10, 10 (plus 3 penalty reps), 5, 5. Overall: ok

bench: 10 x 134, 3 sets of 6 x 150

trap bar dead (4 inch) 10 x 134, 10 x 184, 10 x 234
6 inch: 10 x 280

high incline: 2 quick sets of 10 x 84

Today: I tried my 4 mile lower Bradley course; I wanted to test my knee on hills. Total: 4.12 in 1:03:23 (15:23 pace); I was 15:15 at the park entrance and the exit to the house was also about 15:15. (very close to 15 min miles; like in Austin). I was disappointed in the pace, but it was about 27 F..and nothing hurt during the walk. And I’ve yet to touch my pain pills.